The New York Normal: Three Years Later
It was near the beginning of year two in New York the first time I really felt like a New Yorker. I was leaving my office in Midtown. As I stood at the corner of 50th and 8th Ave waiting for the crosswalk to turn in my favor I saw a man standing on the median. He was wearing a beige trench coat with only his birthday suit underneath. He stood there, amid the crowds of rush hour, flopping his penis around like he was hula hooping with a big toothy smile plastered across his face. I didn’t blink an eye. Just another Wednesday in New York City, I thought.…
The Truth’s About the New York City Subway
New to New York or just here for a visit? Allow me to share the truths I’ve learned over the past 8 months about the New York City Subway. Please Note: This was written while I was riding the subway. 1. Avoid eye contact. 2. When someone pulls out a thick, juicy, voluptuous Chipotle burrito and begins to eat it, your animal instincts will likely take over. Try your best not to attack. 3. You’ve reached a true dilemma when you’re seated next to the smelly guy or girl on a full train. 4. There’s a special place in hell reserved for those who speak loudly on a morning train.…




